Cussler Hustlers
Two strangers, American and Canadian, go through EVERY Clive Cussler novel, from a (hopefully) modern progressive viewpoint. They also get off on tangents and talk about BETTER books, but there’s so much to love with these nerdy macho time capsules.
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Episodes
Saturday Sep 13, 2025
Saturday Sep 13, 2025
We've finally got a caper, people! High-tech hijinks! The US government decides to send the COMPETENT spies into Ajima Island and Project Kaiten (after some... questionable plastic surgery), and our plucky heroes Al and Dirk are press-ganged into being a distraction, something they're uniquely qualified for. Artificial intelligence proves that it's a sound investment. Toshie proves that she's a sound investment. Dirk blows up a bunch of fish with high explosive.
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com
Saturday Aug 30, 2025
Saturday Aug 30, 2025
And suddenly... a FAX arrives! Terrible, horrible, no-good very-bad fates await most of the secondary characters in this episode, which I feel is a nice way to cull the chaff and keep Dirk focused! In the middle of it, though, Dirk has to fly to West Germany and relieve a former Nazi tank-driving farmer of his accidental Nazi loot. And maybe a fighter jet. And a painting. Really, it all seems a little convenient. How many more episodes until we get some SICK robot sword-fighting action? Who knows! We sure don't!
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com
Saturday Aug 16, 2025
Saturday Aug 16, 2025
Dirk and Al start recruiting their Avengers Super Team. The Pitt family tree expands to include one of the men who helped create the atomic bomb. What's better, sushi or sausage pizza? Who's the real sidepiece, Dirk or Loren? How many classic cars does it take to make every woman on the planet horny? And perhaps most importantly, the final essential piece of the Cussler Formula has finally appeared... Cussler Himself! We hit the brakes on the racism this episode, so we can hit the gas of ACTION!
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com
Saturday Aug 02, 2025
Saturday Aug 02, 2025
Longer episode time! Dirk finally allows himself to feel emotion, then decides to make it his whole personality. A woman dares to have a secret, and must be punished accordingly. Japanese far-right ultra-nationalists decide to try American-style diplomacy. Clive predicts the Department of Homeland Security, except in his utopia they're understaffed and underfunded. Also, check out Nancy on Dork Forest with Jackie Kashian this week!
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com
Saturday Jul 19, 2025
Saturday Jul 19, 2025
Short episode this week, folks! Nancy caught the plague, and following the plot of a Cussler novel was too physically and mentally taxing (we've all been there, right?) Dirk Pitt goes for a leisurely Sunday drive at the bottom of the ocean. Giordino rages at the heavens and rends his clothes asunder. Flandecker eats a cigar. The full might of the US Government manages to figure out which country tried to nuke them (the choices being Japan and Finland). Nancy makes a timely Cab Calloway reference. It's all here!
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com
Saturday Jul 05, 2025
Saturday Jul 05, 2025
It's Hot Dirk Summer as we dive into a new book! We dive into the extreme action with not one, but TWO different atomic weapons (though to be fair, only one of them goes off). Submarine disasters? You bet! Secret underwater lairs? And how! Prolonged digressions into the quantum existence of the female protagonist's breasts? I mean, it wouldn't be a Cussler book without it! Dirk faces death with a stoic grin, while Giordino rends his garments and wails at the cosmic unfairness of losing his heterosexual lifemate.
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com
Sunday Jun 22, 2025
Sunday Jun 22, 2025
International Terrorism: It's everywhere you want to be! It's certainly anywhere DIRK goes! Seriously, they should have a global travel warning permanently attached to Dirk Pitt, like he's Vash the Stampede or something. America speedruns the false flag attacks, the migrant caravans, the extrajudicial killings, and the anti-democratic foreign meddling, because that's what heroes do. Oh, and Dirk has creaky old man sex. ¡Qué padre!
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com
Saturday Jun 07, 2025
Saturday Jun 07, 2025
VIOLENCE! Oh baby, the promise of the premise is finally paying off! Dirk gets blown up by a grenade, but fortunately he was near a filing cabinet, so he's fine. Everybody gets shot, but our heroes are wearing bullet-attracting vests. Rudi gets sent on an important mission, and manages to succeed by being racist. And Ammar... well... I don't think I'm allowed to say what happens to him in this description. It might get the episode banned. Join us, won't you?
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com
Saturday May 24, 2025
Saturday May 24, 2025
More terrorists! More special forces! And finally, VIOLENCE! ...almost! We're so, so close to the violence, everyone. Please don't go. Dirk schools the best of the best of the best about icebergs. Hala makes some terrible, terrible relationship choices. Yazid and Topiltzin are betrayed by their 23 And Me results. Ultra-high-altitude covert reconnaissance flights are the ideal location for self-love. Will Ammar get away with it, or will he be foiled by those pesky kids? Find out!
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com
Saturday May 10, 2025
Saturday May 10, 2025
The Lady Flamborough pulls a David Copperfield out of Uruguay and flees to the Antarctic! You don't need to be suspicious of anyone with a gun as a political conference, because clearly they're SUPPOSED to be there! Dirk has some off-screen couch loving while his dad's being press-ganged into an elite terrorist organization! Mexico prepares to invade the United States! This book is BONKERS... and yet, it all still just feels like scene-setting and tension-building. It's all anticipation, no release! Your hosts are going to blow a gasket if this doesn't lead to World War Three! Join us, won't you?
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/CusslerHustlersInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/CusslerHustlersFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Cussler-Hustlers/100094911757286/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/cusslerhustlers.bsky.socialMastodon: https://mastodon.social/@CusslerHustlersEmail: cusslerhustlers@gmail.com